The Napkin Notes Dad and Writing to Connect

Remember when you were little and your mom would leave notes in your lunch box? Me too. So does Emma Callaghan. Every day, her father, Garth, writes a little slice of wisdom on a napkin in Emma’s lunch. Known as The Napkin Notes Dad, Garth has cancer and may not live to see Emma graduate from high school. He hopes his notes – which range from well-known quotes like “Life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful” (Annette Funicello) to his own inspirational snippets like “Life doesn’t always give you second chances, so take the first one” – will help guide his daughter after he’s gone. Other parents, especially those burdened by long work days or frequent business trips, are taking Garth’s lead and striving to open lines of communication with their children through daily notes. This has gotten us here at Pencils.com thinking about how we use writing to connect with others.

Sometimes, the message is specific – like Garth’s notes to his daughter – but occasionally we use writing to reach out and connect in a more general way. En route to a conference in West Virginia, I stopped to grab a quick bite to eat and freshen up. It was pouring rain, so I was soaked, exhausted, and stressed from driving unfamiliar mountain roads in hazardous conditions. My heart sank when I looked in the bathroom mirror. Then, a line of lettering in black marker on the wall caught my eye. It said simply: “You go girl. You are beautiful inside and out.” This simple gesture by a woman reaching out anonymously to her bedraggled sisters to boost their spirits touched me and made me feel connected to something I guess you could call “the bonds of sisterhood,” and not so alone in Middle of Nowheresville, WV. Once, at my first job fresh out of college, a coworker I was afraid of left me a post-it note thanking me for doing a great, professional job with one of her clients. I still have it.

 “Life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful”

Unexpected hand-written notes have always held a certain fascination for me. I once met a man who liked to write positive affirmations on scraps of paper and tuck them into books in libraries and used bookstores. It seems like such a beautiful act, in a world where “anonymous communication”  calls to mind hurtful comments on YouTube videos. When we think about writing as a means of connecting with one another, wouldn’t we rather form positive, supportive connections? Wouldn’t we rather tell a stranger they’re beautiful than tell one they’re butchering a Demi Lovato song?

Readers, I’m giving you a homework assignment (and if the word “homework” just made you cringe, you should probably look into our selection of motivational pencils). Your homework is this: grab a pencil and a scrap of paper and use a note to connect to someone. It could be someone you know, or a complete stranger. Leave “Have an awesome week!” on a coworker’s desk or tuck “Smile like you mean it” into the pocket of an unattended coat. Write out a Mitch Hedberg joke and leave it on my car (it’s the green Outback covered in snow). Then, when you’ve done your note-leaving homework, come back and give us a full report in the comments. I’m excited to see what you come up with!